A Hairy Topic

This post is exclusively for men. And very hairy women ofcourse.

How many of you have noticed it ? Its a bloody epidemic. I see guys wearing beards all the time. Some famous dude once said:

If a man sports a beard, he either has something to hide, or hes too poor to buy a razor. Yeah you guessed right, my words.

Due to this sudden increase in bearded men, Iv taken it upon myself to point out what these guys are hiding.

1. Hey Im a wannabe Frenchman

2. My trimmer malfunctioned

3. I Know I Look Like that Guy Who Did That Thing With Those Planes That Time, But Honestly I Have Nothing To Do With Him. Mother Promise. (IKILLTGWDTTWTPTTBHIHNTDWHMP for short)



4. I dig goats. Baah

5. Im that guy from X-men, Tony Stark.

Seriously man, Drop the beards. And show the world what you truly look like. A handsome man, or a hairy woman.

Whichever.

P.S. Moustaches too are not cool. Unless your Chuck Norris, anythings cool on him.

My Little Ditty

There once was a man named Null.
Hard to fathom, a manhood so small,
As you can guess, he was quite rather dull,
In bed, both in and out.

There once was a man named Null.
Dreams did he have, of might and glory,
when in reality, he was quite rather poorly,
lacking either wits or smarts.

There once was a man named Null.
And as hard as he wished, to amount to a Hero,
and forgive me this, cliched as it is,
he would never be more than a Zero.

P.S.-Limit my freedom of speech again and I'll do worse.

Wanna see something cool?

*This post is only for the awesome. You have been warned.

The other day I experienced déjà vu, I found it to be very awkward. Almost certain I'v been through that situation before. It got me thinking- Whats the reason behind déjà vu ?

So even before I wikied it, this insane theory just popped up in my head.

What if life is a loop. Like death just takes you back to the beginning of your life, and you relive your entire life again. And again. And again. And at some point you feel, Iv been through this before. Okay I know its sounds weird. But it could be true.

This other theory I read about says one eye, say the left eye, captures a image faster then your right eye. So a little later when your right eye sees it you feel you've already seen it. I know. This one is logical.

After reading that one I realised déjà vu is boring. I gave up(déjà vu moment). I did think about my poor readers.

But then again who cares ?
...
...

You've seen this before haven't you.

Total Deja Vu right there.

...
...

BAM!
That's what I'm talking about.

Mind = Blown

You Need To Know

Im not a racist. I do discriminate^. But not by race.
I discriminate between- The stupid, The very stupid and The awesome.
You wanna know which category^ you fall under ?

Let us take the following lines-
I am awesome, you are stupid ( Why can you not be 'very stupid' you ask ? stupid and very stupid are basically degrees of comparison. In both cases, you are stupid. So me classifying^ you into 'just plain stupid' is justified^)

Now if you read the above lines and thought to yourselves-
1.Me not stupitt. Zero is bad. Zero stupitt.
Believe me, you are Very stupid.

2.I'm not stupid. Or am I ?
You are stupid. Dont argue. Its futile^.

3.I am awesome too.
Yeah you must be. Or atleast on the verge^ of being awesome.

Now you know where you stand, or sit.

The symbol ^ in the above post denotes those are real words. Look it up doofus.

Déjà Vu (I think)

*This post is not for the stupid. You have been warned.

The other day I experienced déjà vu, I found it to be very awkward. Almost certain Iv been through that situation before. It got me thinking- Whats the reason behind déjà vu ?

So even before I wikied it, this insane theory just popped up in my head.

What if life is a loop. Like death just takes you back to the beginning of your life, and you relive your entire life again. And again. And again. And at some point you feel, Iv been through this before. Okay I know its sounds weird. But it could be true.

This other theory I read about says one eye, say the left eye, captures a image faster then your right eye. So a little later when your right eye sees it you feel you've already seen it. I know. This one is logical.

After reading that one I realised déjà vu is boring. I gave up(déjà vu moment). I did think about my poor readers.

But then again who cares ?

That Vacuum is Filling up Now

Hello,
Recently I have started thinking (that line sounds very odd) all these weird thoughts I have in my head, I should share it. You know ? Let the world know my genius. Enlighten you all. This blog is the result of that idea.
I know you guys are wondering, Doesn't he have another blog. Just to clear that curiosity- I have two other blogs. Inkblots different much different from this, and the other did I tell any of you my password?.
So here goes, A new start. A new beginning. A new blog.
Now the posts on this blog completely, wholly and entirely depend on my mood. So don't be surprised if you see a funny one and little later a very funny one. There are going to be non-funny ones too. Believe me you really haven't seen the angry part of me, or have you ?
Ill begin soon, I await your feedback.